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10:51 am: i haven't written in here for a long time....havent really had any major issues over the summer. People say they've grown and matured over the summer, i basically just had fun, which was great. I dont think i changed a whole lot, altho i think my alcohol tolerance went up :P It was a great summer, did what i wanted to do, and enjoyed all of it.

This seems to be a recurring issue amoung us, but i'm also feeling the lack of direction in my life right now. I guess i'm at a crossroads, but i dont even know what they are. Something changed int he last 3 days, and i dont even know how. i dont even know, i dont even know...i sound like a megagh :P lol

I really like chem eng, but dont trust my abilities whatsoever. i keep thinking that i cant be capable of all the stuff that a chemical engineer is supposed to do, which is the wrong and a bad attitude, but i dont know how to fix that. im thinking i need to become a keener. or at least a pseudo-keener...anything with a strong direction to it. ive concluded that i am not the smartest person going, but if i work super hard i can make that up. theres so many engineers in the world and maybe 10% of them were at the top pf their class. so maybe i can make it too. the chem eng conference in october in toronto will help with that. seeing the opportunites available to me will get me motivated, im sure. so thanks guys for going to the hockey game in november, i need to go to this conference.

Like Meaghan said, the life plan is getting lost. it seemed so simple. but now its pretty much just confusing. too many open ended questions....its not a good to thing to think about for a long time. I gotta figure out who i am, and what i want to do. both things i thought i knew at one time....sorry for being preachy, but i feel like we're all having these same issues atm. at least we're not all alone :)

so things im going to do this year:
- eat food. ive been lacking on that one lately
- get smart (wont happen, but i can work harder and try my best....pseudo-keener here i come)
- have fun (its more than just working...im thinking soccer, climbing, possibly kayaking and the Formula 1 SAE car, since i got addicted to F1 this summer, if you dont believe me, come see my new car)
- attempt to figure out who i am....this prolly will take longer than 1 year, and will prolly continue to change
- listen in class....i always day dream and get lost in classes, its a problem
- stop falling off curbs....im trying to curb that habit as per glen's advice

thats about it. things are changing this year.....why wasnt i warned of this???

Current Mood: confusedconfused
Current Music: Someday - Nickelback
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